the first hours
So you’re a Mum, how AMAZING! Your baby is here, finally, after all this waiting and worrying, they’re here. Now what?
The first hours of your baby’s life are so precious and so important for many reasons. Your baby is taking in the world around them and absorbing all the sights and sounds and smells and of course their mama for the very first time.
Some Mums get a huge rush of love for their babies when they first lay eyes on them and some don’t. Some grow to love their babies over time and some Mums are still up in the stars and need a moment to come back to Earth (known as the birth pause). However your first moments are, they are yours and they are special because they are unique and belong to you.
the golden hour
Ideally your baby would have what’s called the golden hour with you. The golden hour is a protected time where you get to baby gaze and breathe your baby in and get to know each other with as little interruption as possible. This supports all the aspects of bonding and can help initiate breastfeeding as you get to know each other in a peaceful space, your instincts are free to kick in and you can figure things out slowly together, at your own pace.
This is easier to create at home with usually a more hands off approach to birth and if all has been pretty straightforward in hospital. If things haven’t been so smooth, then you can create this hour as soon as you can, whether that is within hours or days, it’s your moment to take. Have the room quiet, dim the lights, snuggle up and baby gaze…let your hearts meet.
It is best for your baby to have their first feed in this time as they still have their natural sucking reflex from the womb and are usually alert post birth, if you can get a feed in the first hour, you’re off to a great start (more on this in the breastfeeding part).
Optimal cord clamping
If the birth has gone ok, you can delay cutting baby’s cord for as long as you wish. Waiting for white (the blue cord filled with blood turning white) means your baby has their full blood volume, up to 30% can be left in the cord, and they are fully earthside. It has been shown this has many health benefits for your baby including increased white cells for infection prevention and on average longer time spent at the breast for those early important feeds.
Skin to skin
I think skin to skin in general is massively underrated, it’s a great Mum tool even when the kids are older especially if they’re poorly.
Your bare skin to your baby’s bare skin is so calming for you both. It’s intimate and that creates it’s own privacy straight away. It helps your baby regulate their heart rate and temperature and being that close to their mama, relaxes them, they can feel you, smell you, they are in their happy place.
Skin to skin is great for Dads too, there is evidence to suggest that just thirty minutes of skin to skin with their Dad during those early hours post birth rewires Dad’s brain and increases the bond, switching on his own oxytocin hormones.
Skin to skin also promotes milk supply. If you’re waiting for your milk to come in or you are having any supply issues, a day or two of skin to skin and baby gazing can work wonders.
the placenta
Within the first couple of hours of your baby being born, you’ll need to birth your placenta. At home, you may be given more time but in hospital they will be keen for you to birth it so they can relax that there are no bleeding issues. There are many stories of placentas taking longer than two hours to come and all being well but there will be added pressure in hospital.
Placentas are an extension of the birth and love the same conditions, which is harder to get with the excitement of your baby coming, often the energy in the room completely changes with the excitement of your baby being born and your body might be more adrenalin charged than oxytocin filled which slows down the release.
A few things to help with the placenta:
Privacy
Darkness
Quiet
Feeding
Warmth
So if it isn’t happening, firstly try to relax, and believe it will come. You can feed to promote your uterus contracting and also sniffing peppermint oil really helps too, I’ve used this lots to great success in the birth room.
If nothing is working and there’s any concerns, go to the loo, with support if needed but preferably then being left alone, and turn out the lights. The gravity and the alone time works and stay warm, time for those fluffy bed socks you’ve been saving.
You can also have an injection post birth to help with the release of the placenta which goes into your thigh so consider what you’d prefer and add it to your birth plan.
If you’re keeping your placenta, you’ll need a clean, sterile container and somewhere to keep it cool, most hospitals won’t let you put it their fridge, so bring ice packs and a cooler bag or your placenta specialist will provide this.
If you’re wondering what to do with your placenta if anything at all, www.placentanetwork.com is a great place to start.
So the placenta is out, now what?
Vagina health
So after the placenta is out and you’ve had your golden hour or two, the midwives will want to check your vagina for tears if you’ve had a vaginal birth. It’s very common with first time Mums to tear, so if you did, again you didn’t do anything wrong. This process can of course be quite uncomfortable and usually you’ll be put in stirrups, but you can use gas and air and a local anaesthetic will be administered and the stitches are fully dissolvable. You can also keep your baby with you and focus on your baby to distract you. If you need to go to theatre for any reason, your partner and your baby can come too, insist on it, there is no reason for you to be separated unless you are unwell.
I also want to mention Women’s health physios early on. They are becoming a bit more known now but it is still very much word of mouth that lands women at these amazing specialists. A woman’s health physio is who you need to see post birth to support your pelvic floor health and healing and it is so important. I’ll be honest it took me seven years to discover them and go (apparently this is the average) and I was dealing with things that weren’t normal. We’re led to believe they are, like wearing pads for leaking, you can’t jump on a trampoline etc but it’s not. All of these symptons are a sign of incontinence and other issues which can be helped and improved upon and in most cases sorted completely. So you can get referred by your GP or see someone privately. I’m linking to the wonderful Lisa who I saw so you can read more about it but there will be someone local to you.
post birth poo
Tips for going to the loo after stitches:
For your first poo, which everyone is always terrified of, make sure you’ve had tonnes of water, fresh fruit and soft warm foods which are easy on the gut and it’s very likely to be way better than you think it will.
For wees, take a jug and pour warm water over you each time you pee (you can also add a couple of drops of tea tree oil for added healing) this will take the acidic sting away.
Baby checks (including tongue tie), weigh in and vitamin K
So at some point in baby’s first hours, they will want to give your baby a once over and check they’re in full health. This is a great time to ask if they can check for tongue tie but please note that often even paediatricians are only trained in spotting the obvious anterior tongue tie and may not spot a posterior tongue tie (I cover this more in the breastfeeding section). So follow your instincts, if something doesn’t feel right with your baby’s latch, please explore it and ask for help.
They will also want to weigh and measure your baby and all these checks can be done near you. It’s so easy to move the scales next to the bed, check your baby on the bed or on your lap, if you want your baby close to you, just ask them.
Vitamin K is one of the first parenting decisions you have to make. All hospitals like to administer Vit K to help babies’ blood clot to avoid any bleeding which can occur rarely in some babies. There is some good info here to help you decide on what’s best for your family. Again the gentlest way to do this is with your baby in your arms and feeding if possible.
your baby is home
Then depending on how the birth went and you and your baby’s wellbeing you’ll get to go home if you’re not there already, which you’ll need your car seat for and I think every new parent has that moment, where they get their baby home and think, now what?
The first hours…
Do I need to add anything to my birth plan now?
Do I need to add anything to my birth bag?
Will I be doing anything with my placenta?
Is there anything I need to research further?
So let’s explore the fourth trimester.
Copyright of The Minimalist Doula 2020